The Walmart Rules

The Walmart Rules

Brought to you by The TVA Show

Lets face it...you go to Walmart. Oh sure, you have a slick "anti corporation" rant ready should you see those elitist friends of yours, but you go...and you love it. 

We here at The TVA Show know that the real fun of Walmart is the consumers of Walmart. But did you know that there are rules to being a customer?

If they got by you, no worries, we have you covered. 

Presenting: The Walmart Customer Rules.   

1)all children must be accompanied by an adult and should only be brought between the hours of 10pm and 3 am

Infants only.

Please make sure they're unrested, loud and wearing diapers with a NASCAR logo that turns bright if they've soiled themselves

Please leave all diapers in your car. Toilet covers available if needed. 

2)all guests with carts will only use buggies with squeaky wheels and travel in the center of the isle going against customer traffic.

If you need something on an isle more than two lanes away please leave your cart in front of a popular item like coffee, making sure to block access for no more than thirty minutes.

3) After 8 pm nightwear and lingerie are totally acceptable if you plan to fornicate in isles of non frozen items. 

4) All white men over the age of 47 will wear t shirts one size below their body type. This will continue our biological study of belly exposure in l.e.d. lighting 

5) Women 26 and younger are required to wear 48 hours worth of facial makeup.

If your eyebrows do not meet the standard requirement we have check points to apply the appropriate amounts for you. Levels that meet our standards of eye brow appliance are verified by achieving the following looks. Shocked, mortified, scared for your life and Joan rivers. 

6) Conversely women 30 and over will not wear make up of any type. 

Please remove all hair product and keep in hair tied with appropriate sweat stains. 

Women may wear any variety of shirts ranging from too big to bed sheet and require a minimum of one overt sexual suggestion on all shirts ranging from three x and above. 

For example : a four x shirt may have the slogan "my kitty may be hairy but at least it's smooth when wet"

7) All cd and radio appliances must be tested by turning on no less than three receivers to full blast, all on different stations. 

We allow a ten minute window for Clodhopping.

8) All yo boys (also known as wiggers in the 90's) will congregate and walk in troops of no less than three to a unit. 

The accumulated income of this faction will be 5 thousand dollars a year and requires that one person from the faction have a rap crew written on the back of a knock off jacket.

 All participants must have threatening tattoos that say "Thug Life" paid for with their girl friends income and live at home with an alcoholic mother.

For more life altering information of this type- please listen to The TVA Show and Subscribe today (available on itunes, podkicker, soundcloud and all other major podcast applications)

Second Half of the interview with Vapor Joe. With Video!

Here's the Video with Vapor Joe. Now you can see what the crazy cats over at The TVA Show look like in their natural habitats!

A letter to the local media (or how I learned to love the bomb)

(My letter to local news station  posted below)

Preface

When you hear about a local vape store getting featured in the media... Do you break out in hives? Get the cold sweats and arm yourself with protective gear? At the speed of sound, bullshit is a dangerous weapon. It can carry the impact of a 200 pound brick ripping right through the center of your skull. 

But you still watch...don't you?

The media is in a frenzy. From high end buzz word creators to lower level weathermen named Skip, everybody wants in on the action. Say the word vaping and it's good for no less than a three minute argument.  

And isn't that the point?

Breaking news...the media sells sensationalized versions of the truth. 

Are you not surprised? Me either. 

So as the local news channel starts the long journey into exaggerating the argument about vaping- I was eager to see the latest coverage. It involved a store around the corner from me. Many times I had witnessed local coverage of other vaping stories and it seemed to have a pretty consistent pattern; Mention a store, interview the owner, talk to an unnamed doctor without listing their credentials on this industry, ask a high ranking official about vaping and kids, interview a vaper to make them seem ill informed and cut to the weather. 

All of these news segments appeared to be non biased...and yet I couldn't help but feeling like we lost.  Lost what?

That's when I realized; the media is framing this as a contest. 

To the average person hearing a doctor say anything negative is gospel, even if that something is "well, we're really not sure."   

That sounds scary to the normal person. 

Here's the catch though...some doctors are sure. 

Studies have been done.
When the media puts local store owners against medical professionals it comes across looking like the medical community as a whole is against the idea of vaping at all.

 The reason for this is because the media is placing anti vaping medical, political and professional organizations against the small businesses.

The media is purposefully framing this argument as a fight between greedy money hungry whores versus public safety...all the while hiding this agenda by suggesting that they are giving both sides of the argument equal space. If that were true then they would show the studies that have been done, talk to doctors who will attest to vaping as a cessation method and long term (and healthier) vapers.

After watching this happen to a store in my town- I wrote to the local news station's email, facebook and local news outlets (letter follows below). I am only one person...and my perspective means shit to them. But when we're all sending letters that call them out for uneven reporting-and we post these letters publicly- at least we let others know.

...and when they stigmatize your town with the same misinformation that the use in every "balanced report..." 

...By all means- use my letter and change the facts as you need... the media does it, now you can too.   

An open letter to WXII (as sent 2/7/2014): From The Vape Association LLC: 

I just viewed your segment on vaping from the perspective of a local store owner. 
It wasn't really from their perspective though, was it? 

I would like to go on record for my company- The Vape Association (the largest membership collective of Vapers in the United States-and based out of the triad) to say that; the piece was pseudo journalism at best.
Instead of showing vaping from the perspective of local business, you framed the segment as an argument. Worse yet- you revealed no information about the studies that have been done regarding vaping, vapor, nicotine, devices or smoking cessation. Furthermore, you allowed people to pose as specialists without pressing them for proof-and allowed THEM to suggest that there weren't studies. 
Where was YOUR investigative research in all this?

You can do it in one google search. 

Yet, you allowed ill-informed people to offer their detractor views and YOU allowed them a venue to lie- UNCONTESTED- without questioning anything they had to say. 
So let me get this straight; If a vape store owner has an idea, you counter balance that with a Doctors opinion( never mind that you didn't report what the doctors actual specialty is)...if the Dr. offers an opinion, you accept it at face value? That seems less like journalism and more like pandering.
Every report on vaping has the same formulaic snooze fest- fed to us by greedy grubby handed heathens who get their rocks off by creating controversial segments that divide people.
It goes like this; show store, show doctor, give quote about not having studies, mention children, move on. 
So here you are on the vaping sensationalism bandwagon regurgitating a piece that has been done three times a day in every city...Here are the same comments being made by unnamed medical professionals... 
Did you stop to consider that it's a little clone-ish for every third rate family practitioner to say the same thing? 
What about the medical professionals that have come out FOR vaping? Why don't they get airtime?

Are you purposefully pitting store owners against medical professionals that don't approve of vaping? 

Isn't that the same as swaying the viewer's opinion? 
An opinion that , somehow, is exactly the same in every local news piece

... doesn't it almost sound like they've heard it somewhere? 

Like, maybe other reports? 
Didn't that make you ask "how much investigation have you done into the studies of vaping?" 
Of course you didn't. 
Because, had you thought to create a thought provoking segment on vaping- with your own ideas and conclusions - 
you would have come across the HUNDREDS of studies done on vaping.
You would have suggested the eons of information we have on nicotine.
You would have called out these death merchants in the health industry for not having the mind to actually come up with their own conclusions, keep people away from cigarette's and questioned how much they will stand to lose when customers no longer perpetuate their own diseases through smoking. 

Did you do any of these things?
Of course not...why would you? Hell you were too busy phoning in your own piece. 

I demand more of you. Highly paid, figure heads should be held to a -better than standard- premium. Allowing doctors airtime to discus topics that they are not informed of is manipulative and insults me. 
Do you think of us as being so unaware? So dumb that we believe that all doctors practice everything? No? 
Then why just show random doctors as to insinuate that you've brought in a specialist? 
Can I see his credentials in chemistry and nicotine handling? 
Read the reports he has filed on the topic?
See his cliff notes?
Can you? 

This is a foolish and trite game that you are playing.

What about the doctors working at hospitals built by RJR and other tobacco companies? Are they biased? Has cancer paid their duke power bill? 

Did you forget that there are doctors that advocate vaping (for smokers)? 
No, you just didn't look. 
There are over ten vape locations in and out of the triad with legions of consumers (most of them congregated on my group page).

Your fluff piece didn't consult ONE person who has vaped for over a year. Yet you questioned the longevity of staying off of cigarettes. How is this possible? How is it possible that a reputable news source questioned the validity of vaping and it's cessation ratio and yet you didn't interview a long term vaper?

Isn't that a tad bit like swerving the story to fit your "controversy" piece? 
To the best of my knowledge I have never seen a human interest piece done on a new Bakery opening that immediately showed a doctor accusing them of targeting children and contributing to obesity and heart disease. 
This is a double standard. So if you're going to make a sensationalism piece, we would at least appreciate an attempt to offer any facts.
I invite your viewers to watch the segment and give me ONE example of your quoted authorities stating a negative FACT about vaping. They have no facts. So instead they say "there aren't enough studies."
There are hundreds of studies...what exactly is the study quota?
Perhaps most insulting is the title of your segment.
"Could Vaping Become Trend for Kid's?" 
This title could have been anything. Here are a few;
"Could Vaping Save your Life?"
"Could Vaping stop you from Smoking?"
"Could Vaping be a Healthy Alternative?"
"Could Vaping help unicorns play Hopscotch?"
But no... nope. You went with the "using children to drum up controversy" tactic. 
I expect more. I happen to run a company that deals with the topic of vaping everyday- so in this instance- I have spotted the negative influence you added. What worries me, however, is what that suggests about your other "news" segments. I'm not sure that I trust you to guide me in a fair way about stories that I wasn't aware of. I don't trust you to actually investigate those topics. 

Smut peddling in media is old hat...and -yes- even expected. But let us not propagate this to be "balance." 
I would think it fair to begin researching your segment on Doctors that say vaping is a better alternative to smoking. I would also like you to add in that -as of now- more minors smoke than vape. Please also include the following studies:
http://www.biomedcentral.com/content/pdf/1471-2458-14-18.pdf
http://www.ecigarette-research.com/EUROECHO2013-ecigs.pdf
http://publichealth.drexel.edu/~/media/Files/publichealth/ms08.pdf

I found these research papers/articles in ten seconds. I didn't research the claims. Now we're equal. 
Thank You
The Vape Association llc. 

here are some good free press sites when you need to make your point fast: 

http://mashable.com/2007/10/19/press-releases/

http://www.avangate.com/avangate-resources/article/press-release-distribution.htm

http://www.vitispr.com/blog/free-press-release-sites/

Don't let them frame the story for us. They won't ask the right questions. Call them on it...and tell everyone that you did. 

MoocH 1
Brought to you by vapings Number 1, most listened to Podcast "The TVA Show" - Subscribe to our podcast by searching us on your phone apps or click the image below to follow our soundcloud. Weekly contests, frequent guests and silly nicknames. 
This weeks guests Phil Busardo and Dimitris Agrafiotis  

The Views and Opinions of MoocH 1 are creations of  mentally abnormal manifestations and an unnaturally unhealthy fixation with the motion picture "Tombstone." Do not approach MoocH 1. Do not attempt to feed. Refrain from 90's alternative music discourse. 

Oh...and our sponsors may not agree with him. No one else ever does.  

Are We Better Than Our Cynicism

"I reject the cynical view that politics is a dirty business."

-Richard M. Nixon 

If the devotees of intellectualism were layered like a cake, many believe that the icing would be made of cynics. I'm a multi-generational cynic. In fact, I hardly believe what I'm writing right in this very moment. As a self professed coffee shop junkie; I have had my fair share of "all knowing" witty banter. 

Ah yes... the ever present 'taboo topic' coffee shop, round-table discussion.  

There I was... siting among the dissenters and congregationalists; hammering out points made possible by worn out library cards and a caffeine predilection. 

It's all very smut chic.

(see above picture)

You know these people, right? Today they are known as bloggers. 

Hi. My name is Mooch. I'm a blogger. 

It was very informative and combative all at once. Debating Gnosticism and quoting Christopher Hitchens. It was all very sudden and thrilling. A poor man's college, to be sure. It was a wonderful exercise of living life through the lens of "everything is suspect." It was my identity. 

 Until it wasn't.

At some point I sifted through all the words we covered in the finest cloaks and I got to the thing we were really saying. 

"No."

It consumed us. "No" was everything we stood for. The absolute anti idealism; a zero sum game. Everything had to be deduced back to the power of impossibility. 

It was shocking too. Because I thought our rousing conversations at some shit shack in nowheresville was the elected "greater truth" committee. Turns out; we were just a bunch of fairly well read pricks having a pissing contest. It was then that I discovered the difference between "no" people and "yes" people.

"No" people look exactly like your friends. They even consider themselves your friends. They look like you and have similar interests. But they also have some ulterior skills.

"No" People have fun with you when you have important things to accomplish. They need to because it validates wasting their own potential. "No" people tell you things won't work. They aren't punching holes in your ideas to make them stronger...they don't believe anything is necessary. After all, the primordial existentialism question directs their thought process... if you answer this question with "no" there is no reason to persist. 

By the way- "No" people would hate that I attributed the Leibniz reasoning for their extrapolations. 

"No" people secretly believe that they are beyond you...this accounts for their need to tear down your ideas. But they will pose this as a general concern for you "needing to have a little more fun." 

"No" people will accuse you of hypocrisy when you better yourself or follow your whims. They will exhaust themselves with witticisms hurled at your attempts. 

"No" people inherently detest cliches like "follow your dreams" or any other reminder that passion exists inside of us all.  They view all happiness as a form of platitude. 

Your buddy that sits at the bar with you and makes fun of life...going back and forth "playfully" insulting you, because that's the nature of your friendship? To hell with him. He's a secretly resentful former idealist. And the fact that you have ideas still; it exposes the wounds of his failed talents. 

To hell with him and to hell with "No" people at all. 

To the pessimist; life is always ending. That's certainly true. It's what you do with that information that matters. Get away from the fucking "No" people; these derogatory woeful assholes in 'concerned citizen' clothing. It's because they can't find a reason to thrive that they have no valid argument against why you shouldn't. If it doesn't matter anyways, than why not live happy? 

These are what these "haters" look like

Happy? What the hell is that anyways? Laid back with a beer; on a porch somewhere in obscurity? That sounds like retirement. Retirement is the antithesis of prosperity. I dunno man... I think you only need a dream to feel prosperous. People beyond the capacity to dream are experiencing deficit- not enlightenment. 

Where did this glorification of fading away come from anyways? Fuck fading off. Keep firing back. You're at no shortage of aspirations if you're being true to yourself ; and since we're being honest: let's remember that the world's most important cynics busted their asses to get to that podium. It was vision and hard work that made it happen...not listening to a bunch of "good time" friends calling them "stupid" for reaching their goals.

Also in part by:

Peace Out Vapes

You Don't Need an Excuse to be Awesome

So where is this all coming from? It's coming from my own endeavors and the nay sayers that it's produced. It's what infantile thinkers call 'haters.'  Except that; the only people I've ever heard use this term are either purposefully speaking to a demographic that will pay them or people that fall back on slang to justify their inability to act responsible. More "no" people.

Get these words that describe a state of negativity the fuck away from you. 

I began a podcast to speak to vapers and hard working people. A podcast that lets me talk and laugh. A podcast I share with my friend and business partner that gives me an excuse to let him make me laugh. 

I did it for business reasons and to take our company -The Vape Association- into the far corners of the whole world.

And the "no" people called it a waste of time. They said no one would listen and told us we were unworthy of a podcast.

Then people listened. 

We talked about amusing things and offered impracticable bullshit in a field of far too much practicality.

And the "No" people said it wasn't talking about vaping enough.

Then more people listened.

We gave ourselves a venue to talk about the world that we saw in the business of vaping.

And the "no" people bitched because it wasn't live and demanded that it be done to appease them. 

But we didn't appease them.

Then more people listened. 

Because people become morally unhinged by guys like Me and Freeze. Guys that set goals because we enjoy the idea of making things happen. Freeze and I are people that will eliminate negativity immediately because we know something much cooler than my make shift philosopher friends did.

We don't owe you the ability to commiserate with us. 

Not everything we're gonna do is gonna work. It already hasn't but we're too busy working on the shit that has. We couldn't have done that hanging onto people that make a pastime of ripping down dreams. 

You don't owe it to anyone to be miserable. 

You don't have to wonder what people will think when you decide to do the things you've always wanted to do. You know what they'll say...and if you don't want to hear it- get rid of them.

Yep, just like that. Past history or not... tell them you've changed. 

You're neurological pathways can, in fact, change due to behavior. So when you feel like you can't be who you want because "people don't change" science disagrees with you. 

We're all so hell bent on believing the concept of consistency. Isn't consistency the greatest thing you can have? 

The greatest thing to have is the ability to learn. 

There is no honor in staying with people who scoff at goals and visions. Fuck 'em. Do the thing that you most believe in and stop buying into the hallmark sentiment that staying is better than doing. 

Because out there? There are people who will make you feel unending and champion your causes. 

Do the shit that makes you feel human. 

Even if you were one of them... one of those people that lived just to rip on people's goals. Just because you thought you were the  George Carlin of internet comebacks- that doesn't mean that you can't stick your foot in your mouth.

Do it. Shove that mother fucker down your mouth and like it.  Because then you'll be over it. 

I've been stages of my life where the people I kept as company were not people I would like to be seen as. But reality says that; you are the people you keep company with. That's how the world views you. Don't be surprised when people distance themselves from your horror...and don't owe it to anyone to tolerate theirs. The world will see you as you see your closest company.

If that's true... I hope the whole world is taking view of my company these days. 

Hard workers, dreamers, visionaries, strong people, vulnerable people, people with hope, knowledgeable people, people with drive...

these are the folks that fuel the vaping industry. The owners and makers and idea givers.

And there is a lot of nay sayers. Internet champions with low expectations and even less heart.

That's their world. It doesn't have to be yours.

I should know. 

Put this bitch into overdrive and dream right out loud. We'll all be better for knowing you.  

So many people have reached out to us to say they enjoy the show.

We can't thank you enough. It's weird and impacting that someone gives enough of a shit to say they dig it. 

We can't wait to support your endeavors. 

Because we'll all benefit from watching someone strive to reach their goals. 

The views and opinions you have just read are totally views- except when they are opinions. They are also not anyone else's views. Especially our sponsors views. Our sponsors are beautiful and fair people. They would never go for any of this wacky talk... please buy things from them. No really. Did you know that every time you buy something from our sponsors a vaper gets it's wings? 

  

Vaping and the Laws of Attraction

This week's giveaway will be sponsored by Peace Out!

Visit them at www.peaceoutvapes.com

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Four years ago I quit smoking... with the aide of a trusted invention, I set about to end my days of outside "smoke breaks" and strange trips to the mood swing- for good. I'm talking about "Blu" Electronic cigarettes.  There was a familiarity to it...despite it's updated sharp black coating and the mysterious blue shine of the pseudo "cherry," Blu's were the closest thing to smoking  without actually doing so.

  It was time, I thought, because the hammer had finally come down on cigarette users...even in the sanctity of Smoke country. Once thought impossible, North Carolina was enacting a passed law requiring smokers to get off of their asses and join the rest of the country in the smoking section; located conveniently outside of your favorite restaurant, bar or public hold up.

  But not this Blu... this thing was the Steven Seagal of the smoking world... that bitch was above the law. You had to charge the blu- and that seemed more up-to-date. You had to buy cartridges...and that seemed like smoking ritual.

 Four years ago Blu E cigs was my promise of a new me; a better me, ready to look beyond the dirty ashes and muck filled car windows.

                         Visit www.luckyduckvapors.com right now to try some amazing juice, as heard on the podcast this week.                      

                                              But within days I was smoking...
                                                 And there I was outside...

Those cartridges? Too expensive to not feel quite like a cigarette...
That Blu light? Some unwanted question censor device that led to a million un-needed questions.
Suddenly the charging was a pain in the ass and the physical using of the device was too much a pain in the throat.

But before I was done with the Blu Cigarette I had an epiphany:  "What would a Store full Of Electronic cigarette's look like?"
                 
I had never heard the term "vaping" and was completely unaware that a culture was emerging from the DIY attitude of frustrated e-cig users. But my spidey senses were a-blazing. If years in the sales culture had taught me anything it was that; every fad could be adapted to the kiosk business. I envisioned an electronic cigarette utopia of young people in crisp blue shirts; shouting at passers by from their kiosk in the sky...

"You, you, miss!!! Do you smoke? Here try this."
The thought brought tears to my eyes. Who was this "Blu?"

This Blu was quickly in the trash can. The company that owned Blu at the time told me that I would not be able to franchise a location, they didn't do them. Oh, what little even they knew. I saw the writing on the wall, I had told my best friend and he was actually reserved on it. I spouted the profit margins, told him our business would be the returning customers for cartridges, batteries, chargers, upgrades. We looked at each other and suddenly realized the eerie similarity of the future e-cig business and that of Cell Phone sales. And we were right on the money.

Lo and behold, 2 years later our first "mom and pop" e-cig store opened up, and here we are today with 14 or so within a 50 mile radius of our city. Still, no one has really tapped into the mall kiosk idea, and it's about 2 years away. We knew that. We still know it. Instead of coming up with our own kiosk, which we could easily have done, we chose a different route.

The TVA.

We didn't even know what The Vape Association was when we created it. We knew what it could be, and we have since changed it's nature multiple times. It's an evolving business that rely's on the stores and consumers equally. It exists because Mooch and I make it exist, and it's confirmed by our many customers and stores; who have faith and believe in what we do for them, and for us. The TVA has, and is, and always will be a business; never forget that.

The TVA was born because we believed it could be. We decided what it was, we invented the concepts; we invented the rules, and we went to the masses. We work harder then anyone truly knows, and put in more hours then we probably should.

I believe in this thing so much so, that yesterday I resigned my 2 year position with ADT, a coporate company with benefits, phone bill allowance, gas reimbursement, the whole 9 yards. Why? Because the laws of attraction had brought this to my front door, and I wanted to put my life into it. I decided to heed the advice I had heard multiple times "Mind your business, not someone else's" and mind my business. I say mine, but its ours. Its Mooch's and Mine. Its all of our dreams we have ever had about success rolled into one entity. His dream was music and writing, mine was entertainment. With the TVA we can do it all.

Listen to the TVA Show right now, it's embedded on www.thetvashow.com 

The TVA Show:
2 Years ago we decided we needed a podcast. Today, we have the number 1 podcast in vaping; and we hope to reach the people in the world who don't vape, but just want to be entertained.

Why is the TVA Show so popular? We believed it would be. We believed people wanted to listen, and they do. I believed that shaking hands with people would lead to relationships that would help our business, and in come some of the most famous people in the Vaping Community, talking about our brand, our show, and telling people how awesome it is.

It is truly humbling.

But what I have learned, is that through our sheer will, and work hard attitudes, we have turned a little facebook group into a growing community for all; a hub for communication of our customers and store affiliates alike to join in conversation. Where people can learn about specials in the world, can learn where to buy things cheaper; can get entertained, and find a place they choose to check out more then their own facebook timelines.

That's me. My regular timeline gets neglected. I'd rather see whats happening in the TVA. It's what I do. It's my full time job, and I love every fucking minute of it.

You can be a part of what we are doing. If you are a store, you can sponsor us, we would love to tell the world about your product. If you are a consumer and want to get discounts, you can join the TVA; we made it cheap enough for everybody. If you wanna be in on contests, we run them all the time; we have the ability to give away free stuff because of the amazing stores and businesses we deal with. It's the will power and attraction that has brought this to us, to pay forward to you.

If not for all of you being so welcome to our ideas, then we wouldn't keep creating them.

Our next endevour, VapeMania 14, is in the works. The dates are all but set in stone. And we believe it's going to be HUGE. We know it will. And as the Laws of Attraction keep proving themselves to us, we know we will see a lot of you there! 2014 has just begun kids, let's have a fantastic year together.

Southern Vapes website is now active!

www.southernvapesllc.com

The views and opinions of The Freeze are not necessarily shared with our sponsors, the Vape Association, Mooch 1, or anyone else involved in the TVA Show!

You Ain't Getting Your Hands on My Vape!

This blog has been brought to you by DBLiquids

Head on over to www.dbliquids.com and use promo code TVASHOW 

Remember a time when everyone was concerned about unauthorized cell phone usage; and they came out with all these wacky facial recognition software and "fingerprint" scanners and everyone thought they needed it?

How many of you actually use that shit? I have a feeling its a lot closer to 0 then it is to most.

Now, remember how you have said the same thing to yourself 100 times about your vaporizer, and how you wish there was a way to keep those unwanted mouths off of your tips? The Answer is HERE!

Vapor X was announced yesterday at CES 2014 in Las Vegas.

Here's a quote from these wack-jobs "The next trend in alternative smoking devices is the personalized vaporizer that incorporates the technology that we expect from our high-end tech devices. Today we are debuting the newest technology in this space," says Kevin Frija, CEO of Vapor Corp. "By incorporating this biometric user identity technology into the Vapor X personal vaporizer, the door is opened to many customizable features.  The fingerprint lock security allows customers to protect their device from use by another individual and this same technology will lead to the development of additional features and controls," continues Frija. "Much like the fitness mobile app technology we have seen gain recent popularity, vaporizer users will soon be able to download their 'vaping' statistics through a corresponding mobile application in order to track exactly how often they use the device.

Vapor X sounds like a big bowl of gippity goop to me. They are saying that the device will retail between $199 and $299; which is pretty high for a price point for an ecig. Are we all having our magical PENIS' stolen right from under us? Is this the new epidemic sweeping the nation: Stolen MVP's?

I think there is 1, and only 1 reason to have this technology and that's to keep unauthorized minors from puffing on your vape while you are vaccuming up animal cookies. In that case, I can totally get it.

But they never mentioned that as their point, their point was making it useless if it is involved in a theft.

Wanna get in on the action? Listen to the podcast EVERY Sunday

Where? www.thetvashow.com or find us on iTunes!

Where's the GPS Tracker? I think that would be a more relevant technology if theft is the concern. Or fuck, even a low jack of some sort.

But a fucking fingerprint scanner? Are our vaping habits that dire to where this is ever necessary?

And what I really love, their future technologies that download your statistics. Do people really give a fuck about how many puffs they take?

Lemme ask you this: when you were a smoker, did you want to know the statistics behind how many minutes your smoke breaks were, or how many drags a cigarette lasted for? No; no one gave a damn.

My thoughts were, and still are, give me nicotine. Now.

This is very likely the first, of a long line of failed and unnecessary announcements coming in the e-cig world; and we will see that the crowd will continue to push themselves toward easier use items. No one wants MORE complicated; as some of these devices are complicated enough as it is.

Playboy, are you seeing this? Where is our herpes tester for our e-cigs?

By god, if I'm letting people put my tip in their mouth, that's the kinda technology I want.


The views and opinions of Freeze are not necessarily shared by The TVA, The TVA Show, Or any of our TVA Sponsors, up to and including the next one I am about to plug.

This blog has been sponsored by Southern Vapes LLC

Star Crossed: A love Lesson of Vape and Horror

Vaping is like the story of your favorite song. It's born in the muck filled den of a heathen. It's labored over and nurtured. It's tossed about- the very idea of it- spread about in the hopes that someone with enough capitol can present a grid that average eye's can't see. It's pitched, loved, hated, reshaped, recorded, dissected and finally created...

A song is only real when someone can hear it.

This is the story of small business. 

I want to not be a cultural elitist.  I want to not cringe when I hear people say " This is my vape" and point at their mod. I want to let go of my need to tell people; "you are a vapEr and this (while exhaling) is vapOr." 

I wish to stay away from the forums and trite preference that comes with assuming you "know" things... do I lurk? You bet your ass I do. 

If I can just stay out of the inevitable "Clone Wars" debate, it becomes easier to remember that vaping is the story of small business. Yes, straight faced and boldly, I'm referring to the American Dream.

I Went out for a Ride and I Never Went Back...

Consider this; There are two, very different, classifications of vaping in the U.S. 

There's the cultural vapist: Everyone from the newly anointed ego user to a duke owning, VP Live subscribing, die hard as fuck hobbyist.

Then there is the other column: The rest of the world.

If we can look away from our underground behavior we can see an incredible circumstance that doesn't get enough web time. 

The story of the vaping industry is the story of having enough. It's the moment you realize that you've given your life to make someone's dream come true. It's the epiphany...

"I'm in the middle of a rising industry and the bubble is still expanding."

Now...we all know what happens to "the bubble." But this is not that story. 

With this realization- you set out to find a new world. 

We all had our reasons to break into this industry. Some people subscribed to the religion of vaping and went to spread the gospel; others saw a family member vape and decided they wanted in on the action. The most common thing I see amongst store owners, however, is a history of adversity.

Yes...I know I will catch shit for talking all ethereally...but in my company I have the distinct position of dealing with Vape Store owners on a daily basis. It shocked me how closely our stories mirrored each other. Stories of savvy and charm...

Stories of gracelessness and horror, inventive side jobs and charlatan expertise. But the theme that keeps coming up is redemption. Not just some... most.

I'm talking about people smashing their chin on rock bottom, walking up, starting over and busting ass to create something amazing. 

I've met owners who have survived through recovery, lived through persecution, slept on their shop floors and they all keep going. People after my own heart. People that I may not know intimately - but I know all too well.

I started to notice this pattern after the fourth or fifth time someone's back story was shockingly similar. It sounded like, "Hi I'm so and so... I went through hell, did odd jobs, I've woken up in the street, can't remember years...but the lightening hit and the world snapped into place. I'm driven, I'm free of sorrow and I have a successful business." 

So what is it? What keeps the themes of adversity and terror continuously resurfacing in meeting vape store owners?

My guess is that it has a lot to do with not being afraid to live...

A person that has suffered through persecution (even self induced) and lived to tell about, is a person that is not afraid to live the life they want. They quit a lifestyle....eventually even smoking...and they repackaged their values. 

Lots of business owners are people that are accustomed to starting over- because they've done it in their personal lives. They aren't afraid to lose their jobs and cushy existences because they've lost far more...furthermore they've sacrificed far more to continue to live.

Let me Tell You a Story bout a Man Named MoocH 

It's easy to commiserate. If you set about to make friendships through personal stories of shame and degradation, it won't take long to find like minded people. So it should be no shock to anyone that most successful people find themselves in the company of the successful.
As for me; I've spent a lifetime with self willed musicians and sales people. Bullshit artists and exaggerators. People seeking validation and living solely on hope.
And they weren't all wonderful people, I assure you...

But some of them are. Some of these cats will work themselves into oblivion just to make you smile; wake up and do it all again. I could find the person I wanted to be in the strength of people giving a shit enough about themselves to stop being "why?" people and just making life happen.
You're going to have enough of those people around on accident... if vaping has taught me anything from this side of the business- it's that; "why not" people exist in every facet of business and life. By majority the local vape store owner is a 'why not' as hell person. Ask them...ask them about changing life in midstream and taking a shot. Ask them about what it must have felt like to make decisions on nothing more than a whim and a prayer.

When Freeze and I started the vape association we immediately identified with everyone around us. We identified with the smoker who wanted to live a little easier; we identified with the business owner who wanted to wake up-  just once - and feel like they lived an existence they controlled.

We wanted to work with vaping- not compete with it. That is the basis of The Vape Association. 

For those of you that may not be aware- The Vape Association is a membership program where members can go to our direct store affiliates and purchase items with a ten percent discount. Our members can shop from them directly through our site and save money instantly. We have an annual event -Vapemania- held in Winston -by god tobacco country- Salem, NC and we offer content and advertisement driven by our blogs, podcast and general fucking absurdity.
With hundreds of members added monthly and our store affiliation growing by states-we're eerily lucky to be in the position we're in...
and we're thankful.

 Vaping is the story of small business. 

One day that might change. You might buy your latest-state of the art- mod (equipped with go go gadget surveillance camera technology) directly from walmart. You may not be able to buy juice that doesn't come from a factory. What will never change is how we stood and watched as the world caught wind of our secret.

It's easy to be so close to something that you feel unaffected. We get caught up in the ugly side of making thread junkies laugh and swearing to our "educated" opinions. Every once in a while we get reminded that behind all that is some son of a bitch with the brass nerve to chuck a normal life out the window and start all over.
It's one hell of a story.

Vaping is for closers.

The views and opinions expressed in this blog have been brought to you courtesy of The Bellview Mental Hospital. We at the vape association do not adhere to any expressed content provided by MoocH 1... thing is...we can't get rid of him. He has held the staff hostage on multiple occasions and forced us- against our will- to suffer through long hours of Cheers marathons. We have not the heart-nor guile to explain that Sam Malone is not a real living person- much less that you shouldn't pattern your life after a morally bankrupt fictionalized character. 
Please do not confuse MoocH 1's opinions for the opinions of our sponsors. They are just as confused as we are.